THE CASE OF THE OFFENSIVE MOON

     People often ask me about the kinds of legal cases that I handle.  I usually tell them that I am the opposite of The Tiger and The Heavy Hitter, in that I typically defend those who are being sued.  Over the years I have represented many doctors, hospitals, restaurants, trucking companies, airlines, department stores and other such entities in personal injury and wrongful death matters. 

     There usually aren't many laughs in the cases that I handle.  I was thinking earlier today, though, about a rather humorous case that I defended some fifteen years or so ago.  I was representing a restaurant that had a food counter at the front where solo customers could sit and dine.  The chairs at the counter had slats in them, so that the customers' backs were visible to the rest of the restaurant's patrons.  The other customers sat at tables or booths.  

     As it so happened, one evening a rather overweight gentleman was sitting at the counter eating his dinner.  As he sat there, his pants were not sufficiently pulled up, thus allowing his bare buttocks to show.  According to deposition testimony, the man's entire rear end was on display for all to see. By all accounts, this was a less than pleasing sight, and it created quite a stir in the place.  Another fellow in the restaurant took strong offense.  He loudly told the mooner, "Hey buddy, pull your pants up.  I can see your ass!"

     The mooner ignored the request.  He continued eating, as if he had heard nothing.  Enraged, the offended fellow then took his pocketknife--which he had been using to cut up an onion for his bean soup--and went over and began slashing and stabbing the mooner's exposed buns through the chair slats.  The other diners watched in stunned silence as this was taking place.  

     After the initial knife-to-buns assault had taken place, the mooner ran to a pay phone outside the restaurant in order to call the police.  While he was dialing, the assailant came out and finished the job by punching the mooner in the face, inflicting a fairly serious eye injury. 

     The restaurant was sued for alleged negligence in failing to protect its customer from the assault.  I initially thought that I would be able to obtain summary judgment for my client, until testimony revealed that the assailant had previously warned waitresses of his intent to "take care of the problem" if the mooner didn't pull up his pants.  Because the wait staff delayed after the assailant had issued his warning, there was a factual issue that precluded summary judgment.  For that reason, we settled for a nominal amount prior to trial.  

JONES BITS

     ***My son Brendan has been home for the last month.  It has been wonderful to have him back in town.  Alas, he must leave to go back to Annapolis again tomorrow.  He's getting ready to go on a Navy surface cruise next week before his classes resume in the fall.  I will miss him. I'm hoping that he might get to return to Indiana very briefly to attend the Navy-Ball State football game in Muncie on September 5th.  A limited number of midshipmen will be allowed to attend.  Otherwise, he will not be home again until Thanksgiving. 

    ***The Globe Players have completed their run of Twelfth Night in Louisville's Central Park.  I was blown away by the performances.  (I attended every one.)  The shows were truly outstanding.  Bravo!

     ***I'm starting to get excited about this year's Louisville-Kentucky football game.  I was entirely  frustrated and disappointed by the Cards in football last year, but I sense that they may be on the upswing--despite the departure of  a whole lot of players.  Eric Wood (starting center) was talking on the radio this morning about how hungry and driven the returning players are to prove themselves.  Meanwhile, I'm starting to sense vast overconfidence on the part of the Blue Bellies.  This will be a hot topic until the game is played in Louisville on August 31st.  

     ***I'm really into bird watching these days.  I've been getting up and walking before work every morning, and the birds have been very active.  I love to see them, and to hear their vibrant morning chorus. This morning I saw a bright red cardinal, which means that it was a VERY GOOD DAY.  I actually recognized him by his song before I saw him.  

     ***I'm tired of hearing about Brett Favre.  In March he held a tearful press conference in which he declared that his heart was no longer in the game.  Now he wants to return, and can't understand why he is being so "mistreated" by the Packers because they are not welcoming him with open arms.  My biggest concern is that, after Favre had announced his retirement, the Packers drafted Brian Brohm of Louisville to begin the season as their backup (and potentially future) quarterback.  I don't want Favre's shenanigans to mess up the situation for Brohm.  That would not be cool at all.  

TWELFTH NIGHT BEGINS!






Every summer, the amphitheatre at Louisville's Central Park becomes the setting for a number of marvelous Shakespearean productions. Shakespeare in Central Park, produced by the Kentucky Shakespeare Festival, has become a revered theater tradition in this region. The Kentucky Shakespeare Festival is now in its forty-eighth year of operation. Each year, accomplished actors from across the country come to vie for roles in the Bard's greatest works at this highly-respected venue.

http://www.kyshakes.org/

A couple of weeks ago I had the pleasure of seeing the Kentucky Shakespeare Festival's production of Julius Caesar in Central Park. It was, as expected, an outstanding and memorable production.

It should be noted that there is a youth branch of the program. This week, the Kentucky Shakespeare Festival Globe Players will present Twelfth Night; or What You Will, by William Shakespeare. The Globe Players are an advanced theater company consisting entirely of high school students. Admission into the company is competitive. I am particularly excited about seeing Twelfth Night because my son Collin is a member of the Globe Players this year. He will be playing the role of Antonio when the show opens this week. I know that Collin and the rest of the cast and crew have devoted many, many hours to insuring that the performances will be first-rate theater. I can't wait to see it all unfold.

Twelfth Night previews in Central Park this Wednesday, July 16th. The show runs July 17-20, with all performances beginning at 8:00 p.m. Admission is free.

Break a leg, C-Bear!

ANOTHER GOOD ONE

     I have just finished another outstanding novel.  The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time, by Mark Haddon, is undoubtedly one of the most unique novels that I have ever read.  The book, loaned and recommended to me by one of my sons, provides a captivating tale, and it is truly difficult to put down once you have begun it.  The novel won the award for the 2003 Whitbred Book of the Year, and I can see why. 

 

     The unusual story is told through the eyes of Christopher Boone, a 15-year-old special needs boy.  The reader is provided with a unique perspective, and is able to view the world through Christopher's eyes.  The action takes place in the town of Swindon, England, as well as in London.  I will not reveal the plot to you, as I don't want to spoil it.  Suffice to say that the story is one that will not soon be forgotten. 

     This novel is a gem.  I'll give it four and a-half  out of five Js.  JJJJj

     Happy reading!